untilyourbreathingst0ps:

pearls:

pearls:

i touched a dick once and it was the scariest thing in my life because it had a really cold head and i don’t know it wasn’t fun

sometimes the ‘i’ and ‘u’ shouldn’t be so close on the keyboard 

ive seen this post umpteen times and ive always thought that if you switched u and i around it wouldn’t make sense like “u touched a” and i literally just realised you meant duck and not dick i swear to god i am the biggest fucking idiot.

(Source: gingerbreadlou)

repllicunt:

argentourage:

what if you could meet your celebrity crush but the cost was them knowing everything you’ve ever said about them in your tumblr tags

image

phatticuss:

okay scary story time my sister hid this pic of Michael Jackson behind my pillow and when I lifted my pillow I saw this and I screamed so loud I can’t even handle looking at the pic omfg
I’ve heard most of the new record which is pretty, pretty good. Very, very good. The standard just keeps getting raised. When you hear how good the songs are on the last record and then you hear these ones… It’s weird, she’s just growing as a songwriter, I guess.
Ed Sheeran has heard most of Taylor Swift’s new album (x)

(Source: redprincess)

jaclcfrost:

"i’m not bitter" i say, bitterly, with a bitter expression

phirouzeh:

I will never get tired of this picture
toocooltobehipster:

this gif was serious until I saw the girl in the back with one eye blinking.
how to pick up CHICKS!!

eggeworth:

  • cup your hands around them protectively
  • lift them from the ground
  • gently kiss their fuzzy heads
  • say “peep peep” calmingly so as not to be pecked
  • peep peep

(Source: targents)

create a new version of this paste RAW Paste Data